I’ve often heard it said that there is nothing like being a grandparent. Some have told me it is the best thing in the world. Even better than being a parent. Now, I won’t go that far. Still, there is something that is so special it can’t even be described. When I had children, it was a revelation that love could be so strong. So big. So all-encompassing. It seemed impossible to imagine that kind of love ever being repeated. And then come grandchildren.
The other day I went to pick up my granddaughters to spend a few hours together. I had arranged to meet their mom, my daughter, at the park to make the usual exchange: My car for hers, which includes the requisite car seats.
All small children, if you know any, you’ll know this is true, like to push their boundaries from time to time. Yes, hard to believe as it is, even my four-year-old little angel pushes her boundaries. On this day, she was having a hard time listening to her mom. In particular she wanted to hang on the handle of her stroller. A pretty large and heavy double stroller. Physics being what they are, hanging on the handle would cause the stroller to tip and fall on her. An obvious concern for mom. But she kept trying even when instructed not to.
Well, we finally got the girls into the minivan and into their car seats. I climbed into the driver’s seat and drove away. As we drove, I looked in the rearview mirror and said to my granddaughter, “Can I tell you a secret?” She looked up quizzically. “What Papa,” she asked. “Do you know why mommy says no sometimes?” She looked at me in the mirror, “why Papa?” “Because she loves you. That’s the secret. In fact,” I continued, “whenever Mommy, or Daddy, or grandparents say no, it’s almost always to keep you safe. Or to protect you. Or to help you. Because they love you.” She said, “Oh.” To finish this deep discussion I said, “can you remember that secret?”
As I drove, as simple as that little discussion was, I realized it was also a little profound. When we think about it, this thinking doesn’t just apply to little children. It applies to all of us. After all, how often have you wanted something and didn’t get it? You may not have stomped your feet, or stuck out your bottom lip (you know, the booboo lip thing). Just the same, we have a Heavenly Father who loves us. And, because He loves us, He is willing to say no to us.
The scripture is full of examples of God being compared to a father. Why? Simple. There is no love on earth that can explain better, though somewhat inadequately, the love of God. We can identify with the love of a parent or grandparent because we either are one or, at the least, we have had one. While there are exceptions, we understand first hand that mommies, and daddies, and grandparents, want to do what is best for children. So, Jesus says things like, “Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!” (Mat 7:9-11)
Of course, this parental love is an inadequate representation of God’s love. It falls short of fully describing God’s love. I don’t know that we can fully comprehend it, but God’s love is greater, and extends far beyond, even the love of a parent or grandparent. As parents and grandparents, we know we would give anything for our children and grandchildren, and yet, God would, and has, done far more.
However, God’s love for us doesn’t mean that we have a magic well to go to for every whim and want that we have. Yes, God certainly will “give good gifts to those who ask him!” But, like any good parent, He sets limits. There are boundaries. He will not grant what is selfish, bad for us, or outside of His loving will. He will say no. Just like the loving parent of a small child.
James instructs us in this way, “…You do not have because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures” (Jms 4:2-3). When we pray, when we ask for things, we sometimes have wrong motives. Don’t we? God does not give to us so that our selfishness or immaturity will grow. What good parent would do that?
We can be sure God will answer our prayers. He will give us what we ask for. According to John, “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us” (1 Jon 5:14). You see the caveat, don’t you? “According to His will.” Don’t be mistaken. It’s a very good thing to pray, to ask, according to His will because we know that “God’s will is—His good, pleasing and perfect will” (Rom 12:2). As with a good parent, we have to trust that He knows what is best.
So, little children, I have a secret for you: God says no because He loves you.
So good. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you Dave, needed this one today!